THE BIRMINGHAM NAVY

The above is a term that is evidently used to describe the strange phenomena that is repeated weekend after weekend here in summer. We have watched with interest what is going on around the large number of very large motor cruisers that are tied up here in the marina. As mentioned before, most appear to go nowhere, and the ones that have appeared to go somewhere have just gone around the corner to be scrubbed and valeted for the owners and restored in tip top condition to their moorings. They are all fitted with any instrument invented and sport Satellite telephone aerial, radar, the works. At least they know where they are in the marina. Some run their engines once a week while tied up, most just put the heaters on at night, filling the marina with the throaty hiss of multiple Eberspachers.
But things change on Friday afternoons. Then a steady procession of teenage girls appears on the pontoons, each carrying the obligatory phone attached to her ear, and dragging a suitcase on wheels while tottering down the walkways on clattery high heeled sandals. They are followed by Dad and Mum and the groceries in a trolley, and all settle into the family boat for the weekend. There is also the parade of the family pets, ranging from golden retrievers to small furry balls of much yappiness, and near us we even have the household budgerigar in its cage – fine weather it sits on top of the hood, a bit of rain and it is in the back on the table while its owners turn ever redder in the sun. During the sunlight hours there is much sitting on the boats catching the rays, and in the evenings much eating and drinking.
Come Sunday afternoon the process is reversed and the suitcases are rattled back to the cars and the dogs and birds are taken off back to their familiar surroundings. Then life returns to its usual leisurely pace with the few liveaboards, most of whom are in yachts, carrying on the task of getting ready to go to sea. Apart from the occasional small fishing boat going in and out for the day it is mainly the yachts that move.
So said, it could well be that the Birmingham Navy looks at us with a great deal of amusement as we wield paint brushes and sanding machines in the sun. Or maybe they would like to tell us that the garden umbrella is lowering the tone of the neighbourhood!